Xiaoyao Lu

  

Volume 8 | Issue IV | December 2024

United World College of South East Asia ’25

Singapore

  

I believe in a discipline deeply entrenched in personal experience such as queer studies, each researcher contributes a unique piece of the queer narrative by employing it as a lens to reveal the gaps in existing academic literature. The intricate interplay between social and cultural backgrounds and the resulting self-identity shaped by gender has always captivated me. My exploration of queer studies has transitioned from a Western focus to the less scrutinized East, shifting from broad historical and political analyses to examining the impact of Chinese culture on individual queer psyches. This paper, which contrasts Chinese and Western queer literature, illustrates how the Confucian focus on community, family, and the state is appropriated by prevailing homophobic narratives to engender ‘queer guilt’ among Chinese gays. Following this research, my conviction has strengthened that Confucianism contributes to the entrenchment of homophobia in China. More significantly, I have come to understand that Confucianism itself is not intrinsically homophobic; instead, it has been co-opted by separately established homophobic narratives. Elevating this paper to a publishable standard was undoubtedly a challenging task, given that my prior research focused exclusively on queer history, rather than literature or philosophy. The feedback from the editors of The Schola was invaluable in helping me articulate my analysis at a professional standard, and I have the greatest gratitude for their support and willingness to help me platform my research. Aside from my work on queer history, I write prose and poetry (@couscous.cooking), debate with Team China, and take long walks with people at dusk.